Yeah, well spotted ten. I didn't mean to refer to every member. That sounded as if there are no genuine people here. Oops

 

My advice;

1) Dont sweat the small shit.

2) Dont be thinned skinned

3) Jump right on in, and show 'em what you got.

4) Take constructive criticism like a man.

 

Dont feel alone.

 

I got started on this forum years ago by reading some of the nonsense spouted by Distant Lover, and tried to talk some sense into him. Alas, I have found that to be impossible. A good way to join in is to post about someones illogical posts. If you are honest in your posting, soon you'll fit right in.

 

I agree with the OP. While you regulars complain about the good ole days being gone, and complain that without new members the site cant survive, you, by your own treatment of newbies, requiring them to prove themselves and being unmercifully abusive, do indeed cause the problems you most complain about. Ive been here several months. 90% of you are nothing but complete assholes. Of all of you only ONE PERSON has treated me with any dignity or respect. When you cant abuse newbies into quiting, you turn to putting them on ignore. It is you, the regulars, who think that you own this and determine who stays and who goes. Your like babies that throw your rubber nipple out of the crib and then cry because its gone, begging for mommy to retrieve it for you. Babies are smarter. They eventually learn. Eventually they quit throwing the nipple out the crib. You regulars will never learn. You are hopeless and the cancer infecting this site. Your saved only out of your tenure. And site moderators give you a free pass. Its not uncommon in sites destined to destroy themselves. And yet, here you regulars continue to defend your behavior. Thats the truly sad part.

How should it change? Or is this really how you want it? Is this site too small.that only you regulars can exist here? This is like a sandbox that only you can play in? When wondering what is really wrong you only need a mirror.

 

*not_secure_link*www.wordsonimages.com/pics/106387-Not+everything+counts+quote.jpg

 

The good old days were not much different in some respects, but far different in others.

This site and this forum were truly unique, a place where folks could come and interact with others very freely. There were genuine wits in here, Fluffy, Chunky, Binky, etal, were really engaging and clever, arguments were met with wit and candor, usually with great effect. Of the old timers who are left, none possess the talents of those departed, posters like stumbles played off the depth of others and hitchhiked on their intellect, without them he is just a bitter soul.

Personally, I don't think I am any different, today, it is very difficult for me to engage anyone in meaningful dialog in here today. Why? Probably because I lack the intellectual dexterity of those long gone. The old saying; "that it's hard to soar with eagles, when you flock with turkeys", seems appropriate.

But I stick around in hopes that a new flock of superstars will come on the scene.

I am still waiting.

 

At the rate its going now, its going to be a long wait. On the other hand, this is like dating mature women who dont look for a new guy to bring them happiness in his own ways, but a replacement for love or money lost from previous relationship. Its expecting the new guy to be someone he isnt, and then builds the hatred of him when he cant be just like the one before him. Then she blames him for things he never did and remembers good times he wasnt apart of. It destroys the new relationship. Just like the woman, so is this idea. Its unwanted baggage.

 

Anyone can survive here, it just depends how thick your skin is...........stay up on the soapbox for a few more paragraphs and tell us how it should be around here.

 

We can always depend on a noob to bring in a ''new improved' vision to suit there own insecurities.

 

xoxo

 

We are so proud of you Brandi-baby

*not_secure_link*www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/thumbs_up_matt_leblanc.gif

 

(Stands on soapbox)

For a start, at the top, the site offers no welcome to the site or any reference to who mods are to seek assistance or ask questions except a FAQ. A monthly site pm on upgrades or other such site info would also be nice.

Second, I personally believe mods should be visibly different, perhaps by a color code of their screen name. That way other people could see, recognize and interact with them to remedy problems before they get out of control.

The members: on other chat sites, Ive often taken the position of first.greeting everyone and welcoming new people; not coming out the gate calling them every name in the book, but offering help and constructive criticism without insulting. I tried getting to know them, ask questions rather than accuse. The idea that a newbie needs to earn anything here is rediculous when everyone needs to earn their respect every post. Respect isnt proving youre the biggest asshole and that someone else is just a lessor one.

 

When speaking of insecurities, why do you feel you have to interject into this? Are you feeling guilty? Perhaps a few changes would put you out there for what you are and that might bruise your rep? Care to elaborate on why new ideas bother you?

 

Ahem, this is not just any chat site, it is an adult forum, open discussion in threads without undo censorship. In every chat site that I have ever witnessed, the moderator wielded a very restrictive whip.

 

Yes indeed, Brandi should take a bow!

 

True, on all counts. Yet I dont quite understand why you said that.